In a digital landscape where vlogs are more in the ‘now’ and there are so many other interesting people online to listen to, why did I even bother?
What do I, a rambler of a Filipina in her mid-twenties, have to share to the World Wide Web when we’re at a time where information is overflowing and the Internet has become more and more commercially driven? Once this is up, I’m basically throwing myself into a mosh pit of other bloggers, hoping that someone outside my social circle finds me and likes what I have to share.
I created this because of three reasons and please bear with me – this is going to be one long ass explanation, but I promise I’m not just typing words to make it look long.
Reason No. 1:
I Was A Very Superficial Kid
Most of my childhood was a constant move from place to place. I grew up between the Philippines and different parts of the United States and with that I never thought I belonged anywhere. So I did what any lost kid would do, I tried and tried my best to fit in wherever I went.
Although back then, I was naïve about what would make me ‘fit in’. I placed my happiness on external factors such as what kind of group of friends or what kind of branded stuff I had. I thought that having those certain things, being with certain people and being able to go to certain places would make me ‘belong’. But I remember still feeling dissatisfied even when I got what I want.
I had my own share of anxiety and depression as well (and I still do but much less attacks nowadays), where there would always be this gaping hole that I couldn’t fill. And it would just dig deeper and deeper. I was aware of my own lack of self-esteem. I didn’t think I was beautiful or believed in my own talents which caused me to not share a lot of myself to people. I didn’t know what I truly wanted or what kind of person I saw myself becoming so I just hid in my metaphorical cave and kept myself… for myself; for a very long time.
There were moments when I did try to go out and soak in some ‘sunlight’ – from posting a cover on Youtube to making my own videos and sharing them on my social media… But as a result of my unwavering confidence, I got self-conscious of what others might say and compared myself constantly to those who were doing the same thing – but better. And… I just stopped.
Sucks, right? What I needed was a slap in the face. Correction – slaps.
It took a long period of self-reflection before I had my ‘Hey self, I think I know what I need to do with my life!’ moment. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still lost in this crazy maze like everybody else (cue HSM’s We’re All In This Together). Though with the help of the experiences and the amazing people around me, I got to discover more of my truth every single day and got tired of hiding.
Reason No. 2:
How I’ve Been Thinking Nowadays
Now to what I want to talk about in this blog… *ahem*
Ladies and Gentlemen:
We spend our money and time on two things – our needs and our wants. Our needs benefit our overall existence and survival while our wants are our momentary desires that give us instant gratification. Both give us happiness, but the longevity of that happiness varies.
Which brings me to asking you to think about what would you invest your money and time in more: the long-term or the short-term?
Now… investments are practical – an insurance plan, some property here and there, etc. Though that takes time and discipline. The pay out will happen after a block period of 10, 20, 30 years or more. These investments make us feel secure about our future in a very tangible sense (a.k.a. our retirement folks) – which again is always a good thing to think about! In a world like ours, we have to act wisely.
Except, what if tomorrow was your last day on Earth? With that, your investments won’t matter anymore. Okay yeah, your burial ceremony is well taken care of and the rest will be given to your next of kin – bless your soul! Though once they’ve moved on from your passing, being grateful for what you left behind – you won’t be ‘present’. Who knows where you’ll be, right? Maybe floating somewhere. Haunting your exes. Reincarnated into a butterfly… Or fly. Living it up in Heaven…. Or getting an unlimited sauna in Hell (hopefully, not the last one – let’s all aim for Heaven or the butterfly).
If I had the same mindset like before, I would have thought that buying new kicks from my favorite brand or eating at the newest trendy restaurant (yes they are an “experience” in their own right) would be the case, though this definitely is not. Time is of the essence and those “experiences” have an expiration date. They will get replaced the moment something better comes along.
Reason No. 3:
To Be Able Share Good Energy & Perspective
And basically, a place where I can drop all my thoughts in.
I want to talk about investing in what would add true significance to you as a now living, breathing, present human being…
Travelling and getting lost in unfamiliar places,
Overcoming the fears you had ever since you were a child,
Pursuing your passions even when you have a day job,
Digesting the classics,
Coming across undiscovered talent,
Stepping out of your comfort zone,
Enjoying each day for what it is; seizing it…
In a nutshell, I WANT TO TALK ABOUT EXPERIENCES. Experiences of value….
(Val-YOU. Haha. Get it?)
*hoping people won’t stop reading after that pun*
Investing in what should be your number one priority, YOURSELF.
Warren Buffet, one of the most successful investors (literally & figuratively) of all time, said it himself,
“You are your best asset”.
In a way it may sound selfish – and I thought so as well. Being the eldest of the family, I’ve always had that default setting of responsibility and putting the people I loved first.
Though going back to that downward spiral that I mentioned in Reason No. 1… After years of not making my self-interests a top priority, I started blaming the people and circumstances around me for all the things that I wasn’t able to do, and for not being able to be the person that I knew I wanted to be. There would still be moments where I would just pity and put myself down for not being good enough. I would even try to be like somebody else who I thought was the definition of ‘perfect’. And that was horrible, trying to be somebody that you’re not.
There is no such thing as perfection because we were all made to be different. Rare, special… And beautifully-crafted by the Greater Power (in my case, God) – whoever, whatever we believe that is. We all were given that ability to scratch the surface, break through and soar – we just have to trust in ourselves more. Once I started to be more accepting of who I was and who I wanted to be in this life, I realized how simple it really was – to be happy and to spread happiness (no external factors included).
We weren’t built to have it all figured out. We all have different timelines. And we will keep making mistakes. But that’s the beauty of being human – it’s with these experiences that we learn and become a better version of ourselves, constantly. We are the best inventions of this world. No consumer product can update itself as effectively as we can. The important thing is that we remain positive and steadfast in the direction that we know is ours – to truly live your own.
Authentisera is a dedication to this journey; in where all I hope for is that this blog will send out good energy and motivation to whoever reads it.
I’ve always wondered if there were people out there who weren’t just looking out for themselves – succumbing to this dog eat dog world mentality. I want this to be a space where I share my take on experiences that have taught and made me believe otherwise…
- To be more in the moment
- To be more kind
- To be more honest
- To be more original
- To be more passionate
- To be more positive
- To be more myself
To be better than whom I was yesterday despite whatever this world throws; because we only have this life and what’s its use if we don’t make it count ourselves? That we don’t make an effort to really make it our own?
This is how I want to start and I hope that in some way you’d see it in yourselves to find what’ll make you start as well. Because if we’re all living with a meaningful purpose, maybe we can make this world a better place – one person at a time. 🙂